1 00:00:31,798 --> 00:00:34,096 Honey, I'm home. 2 00:00:58,792 --> 00:01:00,226 [Baby] Waah! Waah! 3 00:01:00,294 --> 00:01:01,819 I'm crying. That means I'm up! 4 00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:05,832 - [Fran] Earl? - [Earl snoring] 5 00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:07,560 - What? - [Fran] Come on, Earl. 6 00:01:07,634 --> 00:01:09,432 You get up for once. 7 00:01:09,503 --> 00:01:11,062 [animal shrieking] 8 00:01:11,138 --> 00:01:13,197 [Fran] Earl, feed the baby. 9 00:01:13,273 --> 00:01:14,365 [Earl] Why? 10 00:01:14,441 --> 00:01:17,741 [Fran] Because if you don't feed it it'll die. 11 00:01:17,811 --> 00:01:21,975 - [Earl] How many other kids we got? - [Fran] Two. 12 00:01:22,049 --> 00:01:24,814 [Earl snores] 13 00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:27,013 [Baby] Giddyup, Mommy. Giddyup. 14 00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:28,714 J Da, da-da, da-da, da-da J 15 00:01:29,356 --> 00:01:32,087 Giddyup. Faster. Faster! 16 00:01:33,293 --> 00:01:35,091 Move along, little mommy. 17 00:01:35,162 --> 00:01:37,324 Move along, move along. 18 00:01:37,397 --> 00:01:38,523 J Da-da dee 19 00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:40,829 J Da da da da da dee dee doo 20 00:01:40,901 --> 00:01:44,030 It's the middle of the night. 21 00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:46,266 Why don't you sleep? 22 00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:49,173 No concept of time. Wide awake. Let's dance! 23 00:01:49,243 --> 00:01:53,146 } Da da da da da-da doo 24 00:01:53,213 --> 00:01:56,274 Please, please. Mommy needs some sleep. 25 00:01:56,350 --> 00:01:59,843 I haven't had any sleep since the night you were hatched. 26 00:01:59,920 --> 00:02:02,787 I love being up with the mama. 27 00:02:02,856 --> 00:02:05,723 Ah, is that why you wake me up at 3:00 in the morning, 28 00:02:05,792 --> 00:02:08,056 just to be with me? 29 00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:11,758 Yeah, well, that and I'm hungry! Feed my mouth! 30 00:02:11,832 --> 00:02:14,824 Fill my belly! 31 00:02:14,902 --> 00:02:18,133 Ohh, ohh, ohh. 32 00:02:18,205 --> 00:02:19,832 [creatures shrieking] 33 00:02:19,907 --> 00:02:22,638 - [Fran] Back. Back! - [creature] Mine! Mine! 34 00:02:22,709 --> 00:02:24,700 It's 3:00 in the morning. 35 00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:26,872 OK. 36 00:02:26,947 --> 00:02:29,075 - OK. - Hurry, Mommy. Hurry. 37 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:33,052 - Give it. Give it, Mommy! - Here you go, sweetheart. 38 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:34,884 Right there. 39 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,321 [sucking] 40 00:02:42,930 --> 00:02:44,989 Delish! 41 00:02:45,065 --> 00:02:46,123 Uh-oh. 42 00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:48,726 Uh-oh! Oh. Stomach growling. 43 00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:51,271 Pressure. I'm gonna blow up! I'm gonna blow up! 44 00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:52,897 Oh, I'm gonna blow! 45 00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:55,772 Oh, I'm gonna blow! Clear! 46 00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:57,811 [quiet belch] 47 00:02:57,878 --> 00:03:01,314 Ahh. Good job. 48 00:03:01,381 --> 00:03:02,678 [giggles] 49 00:03:02,749 --> 00:03:07,653 - [loud belch] - [rattling] 50 00:03:07,721 --> 00:03:09,553 Well! 51 00:03:09,623 --> 00:03:13,321 Now you really must, must go to sleep. 52 00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:15,259 Whoa, hey! 53 00:03:15,329 --> 00:03:16,728 We're gonna walk. 54 00:03:16,797 --> 00:03:18,458 We're gonna do the tour. 55 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,125 Wow! I love the tour. 56 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,690 I'm gaga for the tour. 57 00:03:21,768 --> 00:03:24,601 Walk, walk, walk. Hey, wait a minute! 58 00:03:24,671 --> 00:03:26,196 You're trying to put me to... 59 00:03:26,273 --> 00:03:28,435 - [snoring] - I don't believe you. 60 00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:29,908 I don't blame you. 61 00:03:29,977 --> 00:03:33,379 I'm gonna do this all night. [laughs] 62 00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:38,216 [animal shrieking] 63 00:03:38,285 --> 00:03:40,310 J Bop bop bop ba da dee doop 64 00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:43,049 J Bop bop ba da do dow 65 00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:47,651 J Oh, yeah 66 00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,025 [snoring] 67 00:04:09,683 --> 00:04:11,708 Hey, Mom, did you make breakfast? 68 00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:15,779 You're always saying that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. 69 00:04:15,856 --> 00:04:18,826 I understand that from a nutrition point of view. 70 00:04:18,892 --> 00:04:23,125 You always say I'm still growing and that if I don't have breakfast, 71 00:04:23,197 --> 00:04:26,462 I'll just end up looking like a little stunted anthropod. 72 00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:28,592 I appreciate that and everything, 73 00:04:28,669 --> 00:04:30,034 I really do. 74 00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:33,300 Uh... except today. I don't have time for breakfast. 75 00:04:33,373 --> 00:04:36,502 I've got early practice for the game against Mesopotamia. 76 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,912 Cereal? Come on. Cereal? 77 00:04:42,983 --> 00:04:44,678 I want something hot. 78 00:04:44,751 --> 00:04:47,812 I want two waffles with an animal in the middle. 79 00:04:47,888 --> 00:04:50,118 Can you whip that up? Huh? 80 00:04:57,097 --> 00:04:58,531 Don't give me any trouble. 81 00:04:58,599 --> 00:05:00,693 [creatures grumbling] 82 00:05:07,741 --> 00:05:09,004 [horn honks] 83 00:05:09,076 --> 00:05:11,272 [Charlene] There's my ride. 84 00:05:11,345 --> 00:05:13,109 Oh! Bruno's in the car! 85 00:05:13,180 --> 00:05:16,480 Oh! How do I look? How do I look, huh? 86 00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:18,713 Charlene? 87 00:05:18,785 --> 00:05:21,413 Mom, get some sleep. 88 00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:22,978 Bye. 89 00:05:23,991 --> 00:05:27,256 [tires screeching] 90 00:05:31,431 --> 00:05:33,195 [sighs] 91 00:05:36,436 --> 00:05:39,633 [creature] Gimme. Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme! 92 00:05:39,706 --> 00:05:42,141 [gobbling] 93 00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:44,337 Waffles! 94 00:05:46,046 --> 00:05:48,344 [birds calling] 95 00:05:48,415 --> 00:05:49,576 [caveman language] 96 00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:10,129 Frannie, I know your days are awful full, 97 00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:11,968 what, with your bonbon lunches 98 00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:14,007 and girl chat at the produce counter, 99 00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:16,634 but maybe you could put a button on this shirt 100 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,372 I've been asking you to put on since last night. 101 00:06:19,446 --> 00:06:20,971 [gasps] 102 00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:22,447 [groans] 103 00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,507 I've been up since 3:30 this morning, 104 00:06:24,585 --> 00:06:26,883 and the baby wouldn't stop crying. 105 00:06:26,954 --> 00:06:29,048 You had a tough night with junior? 106 00:06:29,122 --> 00:06:33,184 Robbie came in and said, "I want." And Charlene came in and said, "I want." 107 00:06:33,260 --> 00:06:36,958 All right, I'll just run over an antelope on my way to work, 108 00:06:37,030 --> 00:06:41,490 have some for breakfast, put the rest in the lunchbox, I'm covered. 109 00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:43,559 Stop talking! You're talking too loud. 110 00:06:43,637 --> 00:06:45,571 Wake that baby, I'll bite your head off. 111 00:06:45,639 --> 00:06:48,233 Well, nobody wants that. 112 00:06:48,308 --> 00:06:50,504 All'l do is cook and clean 113 00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:53,842 and clean and cook, that's all I ever do. 114 00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:55,678 I'm turning into a drudge. 115 00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:58,241 Earl, am I a drudge? 116 00:06:58,318 --> 00:07:02,152 Uh...uh... 117 00:07:02,222 --> 00:07:04,384 I love you? 118 00:07:04,458 --> 00:07:08,122 Oh. Cook and clean, clean and cook. 119 00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:09,822 That's all I ever do. 120 00:07:09,897 --> 00:07:11,558 These are the tools of my trade. 121 00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:13,532 How's my favorite married couple? 122 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,329 Fran, put the knife down. 123 00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:17,734 OK, see you at work. 124 00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:20,502 Right behind you. 125 00:07:20,574 --> 00:07:22,565 Oh! Whoa! 126 00:07:25,846 --> 00:07:28,008 I don't get what the big deal is. 127 00:07:28,081 --> 00:07:29,879 We all have our parts to play. 128 00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:32,146 I'm the breadwinner, and she's the drudge. 129 00:07:32,219 --> 00:07:33,414 Where's the problem? 130 00:07:33,487 --> 00:07:37,253 Well, we are in uncharted territory now, pally boy. 131 00:07:37,324 --> 00:07:40,885 This new thing with dinosaurs getting married 132 00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:43,453 has thrown the conventional wisdom out the window. 133 00:07:43,530 --> 00:07:45,897 All right. Let's try to get a handle on this. 134 00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:48,594 I've got a wife's who's unhappy about something. 135 00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:51,730 This is without historical precedent. 136 00:07:52,406 --> 00:07:54,238 OK. Let's think. 137 00:07:54,308 --> 00:07:56,834 Yeah. We should be able to figure this out. 138 00:07:56,910 --> 00:08:00,778 Yeah, we got brains the size of walnuts. 139 00:08:13,393 --> 00:08:15,623 All right. What about this? 140 00:08:15,696 --> 00:08:17,926 Fran's, like, broken, right? 141 00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:19,557 I got a broken wife. 142 00:08:19,633 --> 00:08:22,034 So, what do you do if your car is broken? 143 00:08:22,102 --> 00:08:25,732 Uh... you kick it and leave it by the road. 144 00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:29,174 Yeah, but what if you're used to your car, 145 00:08:29,243 --> 00:08:32,144 and you've put on a few pounds since you met your car, 146 00:08:32,212 --> 00:08:34,840 and you're not sure if you can attract another car? 147 00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:38,577 Are we really talking about cars, here, pally boy? 148 00:08:38,652 --> 00:08:40,313 I don't know what the problem is. 149 00:08:40,387 --> 00:08:42,822 She's been upset ever since the baby was born. 150 00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:44,619 She wasn't upset before the baby. 151 00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:46,284 Before the baby, not upset. 152 00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:48,260 After the baby, upset. 153 00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:51,025 Baby, upset. No baby, no upset. 154 00:08:52,566 --> 00:08:54,125 You lost me completely. 155 00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:57,398 It's the baby! It's the baby and the house and the kids. 156 00:08:57,471 --> 00:08:59,838 It's too much for her. She needs some time off. 157 00:08:59,907 --> 00:09:01,602 But if she takes some time off, 158 00:09:01,675 --> 00:09:04,474 then who looks after the kids? 159 00:09:14,421 --> 00:09:16,685 I am so hungry. 160 00:09:17,758 --> 00:09:20,056 - You could do it. - Huh? 161 00:09:20,127 --> 00:09:22,255 You could take the kids for a weekend. 162 00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:23,854 Why would I want to do that? 163 00:09:23,931 --> 00:09:26,525 Well, because it's just one weekend. 164 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:28,090 And when she gets back, 165 00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:30,296 she'll be relaxed and refreshed 166 00:09:30,370 --> 00:09:33,431 and ready to go again like a brand-new drudge. 167 00:09:33,507 --> 00:09:35,839 Yeah. I guess I could look after my kids 168 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,536 for a couple of days, 169 00:09:37,611 --> 00:09:39,807 seeing as how it's in my own self-interest. 170 00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:41,871 Well, we did it. 171 00:09:42,983 --> 00:09:46,749 We had a problem, gave it some thought, and we solved it. 172 00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:49,551 - And I feel pretty good. - Me too. 173 00:09:49,623 --> 00:09:51,955 What day is this? 174 00:09:52,025 --> 00:09:55,154 - I have no idea. - Oh. 175 00:09:55,729 --> 00:09:57,527 Not the mama! Not the mama! 176 00:09:57,598 --> 00:09:59,965 Not the mama! Not the mama! 177 00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:03,196 Not the mama! Not the mama! Not the mama! 178 00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:07,605 You do that one more time, and I'm going to throw you across the room! 179 00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:11,937 - Not the mama! - Ahh! 180 00:10:12,012 --> 00:10:13,138 Wee! Oof! 181 00:10:16,550 --> 00:10:18,018 Again! 182 00:10:19,219 --> 00:10:20,380 What's for dinner? 183 00:10:20,454 --> 00:10:21,853 I don't like your attitude. 184 00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:23,253 [gasps] 185 00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:27,521 It doesn't look done to me. 186 00:10:27,594 --> 00:10:30,063 It's done. It's damn done. 187 00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:32,531 Hey! You give me that back, or I'll kill you. 188 00:10:32,599 --> 00:10:34,158 Here you go, ace. 189 00:10:34,234 --> 00:10:36,532 Next time you might want to turn the oven on. 190 00:10:36,603 --> 00:10:38,230 Uh, just a thought. 191 00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:45,570 So, what do you think really happened to Mom? 192 00:10:45,646 --> 00:10:48,115 Nervous breakdown, carried off by predators? 193 00:10:48,182 --> 00:10:49,707 Dad said she's at Grandma's. 194 00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:52,275 Isn't that what they always tell the children. 195 00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:55,781 Hey, Dad, when's Mom coming back from Grandma's? 196 00:10:55,856 --> 00:10:58,985 When she's recuperated from you. Until then, I'm the mother. 197 00:10:59,059 --> 00:11:01,892 OK, Mom, can I go to a movie tonight? 198 00:11:01,962 --> 00:11:03,293 Not a chance! 199 00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:06,862 Dad said I could. 200 00:11:09,570 --> 00:11:11,868 Uh... he really did? 201 00:11:11,939 --> 00:11:12,929 Mm-hmm. 202 00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:15,475 Dad, I had a late lunch. See you later. 203 00:11:15,542 --> 00:11:16,976 Where are you going? 204 00:11:17,044 --> 00:11:19,138 Out with the guys to mark some territory. 205 00:11:19,213 --> 00:11:20,237 Take a sweater. 206 00:11:20,314 --> 00:11:23,511 Wait! If he gets to go out, I do too. 207 00:11:23,584 --> 00:11:25,416 Ahh! 208 00:11:25,486 --> 00:11:27,887 Oh! Oh! 209 00:11:27,955 --> 00:11:29,582 I slaved over a hot oven 210 00:11:29,656 --> 00:11:31,522 making a nice dinner for you kids, 211 00:11:31,592 --> 00:11:34,527 and now you'll sit at this table and eat that dinner 212 00:11:34,595 --> 00:11:37,565 and express proper gratitude to your mother/father! 213 00:11:37,631 --> 00:11:39,998 [groaning] 214 00:11:40,067 --> 00:11:41,432 He's stuck there. 215 00:11:41,502 --> 00:11:43,937 And yet we can move freely. 216 00:11:45,305 --> 00:11:46,568 - 'Night! - 'Night! 217 00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:49,439 You don't think I'll let go of this table 218 00:11:49,510 --> 00:11:50,944 to come after you two? 219 00:11:51,011 --> 00:11:54,413 I'm telling you, you're playing with fire! 220 00:11:54,481 --> 00:11:56,506 No. I'm playing with fire. 221 00:11:56,583 --> 00:11:57,812 What? 222 00:11:57,885 --> 00:11:58,977 [laughs] Ooh. 223 00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,417 Oh! 224 00:12:01,421 --> 00:12:03,549 Oh! Oh! Oh! 225 00:12:03,624 --> 00:12:05,592 [laughing] 226 00:12:05,659 --> 00:12:07,252 - Daddy! - What? 227 00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:09,386 - Hot. - Oh! 228 00:12:09,463 --> 00:12:10,692 Where are we going? 229 00:12:10,764 --> 00:12:13,358 [Baby laughing] 230 00:12:16,270 --> 00:12:17,362 Again! 231 00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:19,565 Not again! Not ever again! 232 00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:21,005 No more of this for me. 233 00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:23,441 Tomorrow I go back to work, and I'm only grateful 234 00:12:23,510 --> 00:12:25,444 that I am not the one who has to do this 235 00:12:25,512 --> 00:12:28,379 for the rest of my life. 236 00:12:29,716 --> 00:12:32,651 The mama. 237 00:12:32,719 --> 00:12:33,914 Hi, honey. 238 00:12:33,987 --> 00:12:35,250 How was your day? 239 00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:39,855 No, no, no, Fran. Don't explode. 240 00:12:39,927 --> 00:12:41,952 Everything's all right. 241 00:12:42,029 --> 00:12:43,224 Take another day away. 242 00:12:43,297 --> 00:12:46,198 I don't want another day away. I missed it here. 243 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:47,927 But you were unhappy here. 244 00:12:48,001 --> 00:12:50,766 - But I was unhappy away. - Now, Fran, make sense. 245 00:12:50,838 --> 00:12:53,603 There's only here and away. The kids made you unhappy, 246 00:12:53,674 --> 00:12:55,904 I gave you a whole weekend off from the kids. 247 00:12:55,976 --> 00:12:58,411 - Now you're fixed. - It's not the kids. 248 00:12:58,479 --> 00:13:00,777 Earl, there's something wrong in my life, 249 00:13:00,848 --> 00:13:02,475 and I don't know what it is. 250 00:13:02,549 --> 00:13:05,416 Your life? What life? Your life is me and the kids. 251 00:13:05,486 --> 00:13:08,421 All right, look. Here's your life. 252 00:13:08,489 --> 00:13:10,355 This is the kids. 253 00:13:10,424 --> 00:13:11,448 OK? 254 00:13:11,525 --> 00:13:14,790 And this is... this is me. 255 00:13:14,862 --> 00:13:18,389 OK, now, if it's not the kids... 256 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:19,990 ...what is it? 257 00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:21,831 [telephone rings] 258 00:13:22,903 --> 00:13:25,133 Hello. Roy? 259 00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:27,469 It's me. 260 00:13:30,244 --> 00:13:32,474 [sighs] You should have seen her, Roy, 261 00:13:32,546 --> 00:13:34,378 just standing there looking at me. 262 00:13:34,448 --> 00:13:36,644 It made me feel so bad, it was all I could do 263 00:13:36,717 --> 00:13:39,015 to leave the house and come down to the bar. 264 00:13:39,086 --> 00:13:41,555 - What does she want from you? - She doesn't know. 265 00:13:41,622 --> 00:13:44,057 As I understand it, she does not know. 266 00:13:44,124 --> 00:13:46,149 So then why do you have to do anything? 267 00:13:46,226 --> 00:13:47,990 Because I'm the problem. 268 00:13:48,061 --> 00:13:50,758 Look, Earl, I've known you 27 years. 269 00:13:50,831 --> 00:13:52,959 That's longer than Fran's known you. 270 00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:56,333 And in all that time, I never thought of you as a problem once. 271 00:13:56,403 --> 00:13:57,962 Yeah, but you're my pal. 272 00:13:58,038 --> 00:14:01,008 Well, what about the rest of you guys? You know Earl. 273 00:14:01,074 --> 00:14:03,566 Has anybody here got a problem with him? 274 00:14:03,644 --> 00:14:07,877 - He's a good guy. - We love you, big guy. 275 00:14:09,783 --> 00:14:13,344 Look, you're a room full of guys, and the problem's with the wife. 276 00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:16,822 And the wife is female, so maybe what you've got 277 00:14:16,890 --> 00:14:19,018 is a male/female problem. 278 00:14:19,092 --> 00:14:22,494 What kind of male/female problem? We're married a long time, 279 00:14:22,563 --> 00:14:24,258 and we just had a new kid. 280 00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:26,732 Anyway, just this morning I said, "I love you." 281 00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:30,327 - Did you say it sincerely? - Nah. It was a defense mechanism. 282 00:14:30,404 --> 00:14:33,430 When was the last time you did the mating dance? 283 00:14:33,507 --> 00:14:36,442 - What are you talking about? - The mating dance. 284 00:14:36,510 --> 00:14:39,070 The ultimate expression 285 00:14:39,146 --> 00:14:42,980 of a male's absolute commitment to a female. 286 00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:45,144 [screams] 287 00:14:45,219 --> 00:14:48,211 I myself do it three, four times a week. 288 00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:52,384 The mating dance is a courtship ritual. You do it to woo and win. 289 00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,621 I wooed. I'won. I'm done. 290 00:14:54,695 --> 00:14:56,686 Maybe it's time to re-woo. 291 00:14:56,763 --> 00:14:59,198 I don't have to. I got her. She's in the house. 292 00:14:59,266 --> 00:15:01,792 Maybe the mating dance isn't just to get her. 293 00:15:01,869 --> 00:15:04,566 Maybe it's to keep her. 294 00:15:04,638 --> 00:15:08,199 Forget it. You don't do the mating dance for a 38-year-old mother. 295 00:15:08,275 --> 00:15:10,710 - Why not? - Because. 296 00:15:10,777 --> 00:15:12,108 Because what? 297 00:15:12,179 --> 00:15:15,342 Because... uh... 298 00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:17,884 I forget how. 299 00:15:21,755 --> 00:15:23,951 [male on TV] And finally, in local news, 300 00:15:24,024 --> 00:15:26,254 officials at the city zoo report no luck 301 00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:28,727 in trying to mate Ling-Ling and Chang-Chang, 302 00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:31,127 the two rare imported humans. 303 00:15:31,198 --> 00:15:32,723 Zookeepers are baffled 304 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:35,098 at why two seemingly healthy cavepeople 305 00:15:35,169 --> 00:15:37,228 have not yet produced offspring. 306 00:15:37,304 --> 00:15:41,434 At this point, it's feared that Ling-Ling is barren. 307 00:15:41,508 --> 00:15:42,998 And now for the weather. 308 00:15:43,076 --> 00:15:44,441 I'm going to bed. 309 00:15:44,511 --> 00:15:46,343 Oh, OK. 310 00:15:47,347 --> 00:15:50,044 I'm not cleaning anything up. I'm just going to bed. 311 00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:52,609 - OK. - Don't expect anything from me. 312 00:15:52,686 --> 00:15:53,778 I wouldn't. 313 00:15:53,854 --> 00:15:56,551 And if you lose a button, whose problem is that? 314 00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:58,318 Mine, all mine. 315 00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:01,325 Good night, dear. 316 00:16:01,395 --> 00:16:04,057 [Fran] Don't patronize me. 317 00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:07,101 [male 2 on TV] Hey, guys, wanna make more of an impression 318 00:16:07,167 --> 00:16:08,601 with the ladies? 319 00:16:08,669 --> 00:16:10,103 From time immemorial, 320 00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:12,400 dinosaurs have known there's only one way 321 00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:14,031 to a woman's heart. 322 00:16:14,108 --> 00:16:17,237 It's not flowers. It's not candy. 323 00:16:17,311 --> 00:16:20,212 Yes, it's the mating dance. 324 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:23,306 Whether you're a beginner wanting to learn first steps 325 00:16:23,383 --> 00:16:24,748 for after the prom 326 00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:26,616 or an old married guy 327 00:16:26,687 --> 00:16:29,657 with a wife who's overwhelmed by one kid too many, 328 00:16:29,723 --> 00:16:32,693 Mel Luster's Mating Dance Academy 329 00:16:32,759 --> 00:16:34,284 has the steps for you. 330 00:16:34,361 --> 00:16:35,658 We're open all night 331 00:16:35,729 --> 00:16:37,322 because, let's face it, 332 00:16:37,397 --> 00:16:38,990 when else you gonna come here? 333 00:16:39,066 --> 00:16:42,730 Mel Luster, since 72 million B.C., 334 00:16:42,803 --> 00:16:44,396 always the same location, 335 00:16:44,471 --> 00:16:47,099 in the heart of the seedy part of town. 336 00:16:53,781 --> 00:16:56,443 Hey, you in the door, how can I help you? 337 00:16:56,517 --> 00:16:57,780 Oh, uh, me? 338 00:16:57,851 --> 00:17:01,446 Well, I'm here for the $29.95 refresher course. 339 00:17:01,522 --> 00:17:03,650 Well, come on. Let's get started. 340 00:17:03,724 --> 00:17:06,056 Let's try, uh, a bob dip. 341 00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:08,117 Can you bob dip for me? 342 00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:10,664 Well, I, uh... uh... 343 00:17:10,731 --> 00:17:13,200 OK. Not at all. 344 00:17:13,267 --> 00:17:14,996 Well, we're open all night. 345 00:17:16,003 --> 00:17:19,371 - [Mel] Bend, will you bend? - [Earl] Come on, I've got such a cramp. 346 00:17:19,439 --> 00:17:20,964 I'm not as young as I used to be. 347 00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:23,601 - [Mel] How old are you? - [Earl] Uh... 28. 348 00:17:23,677 --> 00:17:25,167 Yeah. Right. 349 00:17:25,245 --> 00:17:26,804 Left, right. And left. 350 00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:28,644 [both] Weave. 351 00:17:28,715 --> 00:17:30,513 Turn, kick. 352 00:17:30,584 --> 00:17:32,814 Bob, bob, dip. 353 00:17:32,886 --> 00:17:34,149 Weave. 354 00:17:34,221 --> 00:17:35,950 Weave, turn... 355 00:17:36,023 --> 00:17:37,491 kick. 356 00:17:37,558 --> 00:17:38,684 Neck. 357 00:17:38,759 --> 00:17:39,749 Neck. 358 00:17:39,827 --> 00:17:41,556 Chin, chin, chin. 359 00:17:41,628 --> 00:17:43,255 - Yeah! - [Earl laughing] 360 00:17:43,330 --> 00:17:48,825 Let's see how Marilyn, our blushing bachelorette, liked it. 361 00:17:48,902 --> 00:17:52,361 Oh! I could spend the rest of my life with you. 362 00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:55,033 Thanks. I'm married. 363 00:17:55,109 --> 00:17:58,602 - $29.95. Pay Mel. - Yeah, OK. 364 00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:04,479 Mel, it's a beautiful thing you do. 365 00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:06,610 Oh, it's very fulfilling. 366 00:18:06,687 --> 00:18:07,950 Next! 367 00:18:08,021 --> 00:18:11,389 Caveman from the zoo. 368 00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:13,984 Chang-Chang, come on in. 369 00:18:14,061 --> 00:18:15,995 We've been expecting you. 370 00:18:16,063 --> 00:18:18,691 [grunting] 371 00:18:33,881 --> 00:18:35,713 Frannie. 372 00:18:37,384 --> 00:18:39,443 Frannie? 373 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:40,885 Yoo-hoo. 374 00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:41,978 Frannie? 375 00:18:42,055 --> 00:18:44,251 Mmm. 376 00:18:44,324 --> 00:18:45,883 Earl? Where have you been? 377 00:18:45,959 --> 00:18:48,553 I've been out taking care of your problem. 378 00:18:48,629 --> 00:18:52,156 You'll be happy to know that you don't have a problem anymore. 379 00:18:52,232 --> 00:18:54,667 I'm so happy. Good night. 380 00:18:54,735 --> 00:18:56,294 No, no, no! Look! 381 00:18:56,370 --> 00:18:58,771 You're gonna want to see this. It's important. 382 00:18:58,839 --> 00:19:01,774 I learned it all over again, just for you. 383 00:19:09,082 --> 00:19:11,312 Ahh! Mm-mm. 384 00:19:14,188 --> 00:19:16,987 Ahh. Ahh. 385 00:19:18,625 --> 00:19:19,717 Ooh. 386 00:19:19,793 --> 00:19:21,283 Ooh, ooh, ooh! 387 00:19:22,196 --> 00:19:23,220 Mmm. 388 00:19:23,297 --> 00:19:27,825 Doo, doo, doo. 389 00:19:27,901 --> 00:19:29,801 Da! 390 00:19:32,573 --> 00:19:33,938 Fran? 391 00:19:34,007 --> 00:19:36,908 [crickets chirping] 392 00:19:40,080 --> 00:19:43,106 Your problem is just that you're tired all the time. 393 00:19:48,122 --> 00:19:49,920 [Baby] I'm up again! 394 00:19:49,990 --> 00:19:51,754 Oh, I'll get it. 395 00:19:51,825 --> 00:19:53,725 No, no, sweetheart. You sleep. 396 00:19:53,794 --> 00:19:55,853 You need your sleep. 397 00:20:00,334 --> 00:20:02,132 What? 398 00:20:03,704 --> 00:20:05,536 [Baby] Not the mama! Not the mama! 399 00:20:05,606 --> 00:20:06,971 Not the mama! Not the mama! 400 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,702 I really wish you'd grow out of this. 401 00:20:09,776 --> 00:20:13,508 Hey, weekend guy, you think you got what it takes to put me to sleep? 402 00:20:13,580 --> 00:20:17,813 Please. I've outlasted actual mamas. 403 00:20:17,885 --> 00:20:20,513 Hey, what are you doing? 404 00:20:20,587 --> 00:20:21,645 [humming] 405 00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:24,054 Hey, this is nice. I like it. 406 00:20:24,124 --> 00:20:27,025 Hey, you like that, then you'll really like this. 407 00:20:27,094 --> 00:20:29,495 - What? Whoa! - [both laughing] 408 00:20:29,563 --> 00:20:31,531 Ooh, this is fun. 409 00:20:31,598 --> 00:20:34,033 What are you doing, Daddy? 410 00:20:34,101 --> 00:20:36,627 What are you doing? 411 00:20:36,703 --> 00:20:39,138 Whoa. Daddy's dancing. 412 00:20:39,206 --> 00:20:40,935 J La la, hmm hmm hmm 413 00:20:41,008 --> 00:20:42,669 ♪ La la la la 414 00:20:42,743 --> 00:20:47,078 J La la, hmm hmm hmm 415 00:20:47,147 --> 00:20:48,911 [Earl] ; Daddy, Daddy 416 00:20:48,982 --> 00:20:50,347 J Dancing, dancing 417 00:20:50,417 --> 00:20:54,047 J Dancing for the baby 418 00:20:54,121 --> 00:20:56,647 J Goo ga ga, goo goo 419 00:21:15,809 --> 00:21:17,743 Look, look. He fell asleep. 420 00:21:17,811 --> 00:21:19,006 1 did it. 421 00:21:19,079 --> 00:21:21,639 You put the baby to sleep with the mating dance. 422 00:21:21,715 --> 00:21:25,345 No, no, no. That was just a baby dance. 423 00:21:25,419 --> 00:21:28,184 I loved it. 424 00:21:28,255 --> 00:21:31,190 But why didn't you like the one I did for you upstairs? 425 00:21:31,258 --> 00:21:34,125 I liked that one 20 years ago. 426 00:21:34,194 --> 00:21:35,889 Now I like this dance, 427 00:21:35,963 --> 00:21:38,523 where you got out of bed in the middle of the night 428 00:21:38,599 --> 00:21:40,067 and helped me. 429 00:21:40,134 --> 00:21:43,126 That's the best mating dance I've ever seen. 430 00:21:45,873 --> 00:21:47,102 Come on. 431 00:21:48,242 --> 00:21:49,505 What are we doing? 432 00:21:49,576 --> 00:21:51,772 What would you like to do? 433 00:21:51,845 --> 00:21:53,745 If it's all the same to you, Fran, 434 00:21:53,814 --> 00:21:55,782 I'd like to catch about 40 winks. 435 00:21:55,849 --> 00:21:59,046 You got it, big boy.